It really is as simple as that. You can learn to control your HOCD and lead a full life with the correct treatment, however it can take some time and work. HOCD Or Denial? HOCD has been around for a long time and, to those in the know, is an established and well-understood sub-type of OCD. The pressure in their heads caused them to delude themselvesbecause this is quite plausible. Im also a CHRISTIAN and 13 years old who is in the 8th grade. Even if they are straight and do not desire to be attracted to the same sex, people with HOCD may have obsessive thoughts about being gay or about being attracted to the same sex. I dont want comments telling me to accept this cause thats what I DONT want. Which is vice versa of how an HOCD sufferer feels. By self-assessment and monitoring, you can easily identify whether it is OCD or false thoughts are triggered by HOCD. HOCD or Denial?!? I treated people using Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) and saw people get better day in and day out. People who have experienced HOCD, truly believe it. The mission of TherapyMantra is to provide inexpensive, accessible, and professional online mental health care to the individuals all around the world. And compared to you I never felt that way about boys when I was younger. Theres a concept known as false attraction. Keep in mind that this feels like youre attracted to him. Some people shared their experiences. Just because you may have certain thoughts, that does not necessarily mean that you would act out those thoughts. Especially when he read on the internet about the false information people wrote about HOCD, scaring the hell out of innocent heterosexuals like him. Just stay connected till the end. This is a heterosexual persons fear that they will become gay. A mental health expert can support you and help you understand and control your thoughts and feelings if you are having persistent and unwelcome doubts about your sexual orientation. Over time, these exposures will help you learn how to sit with any uncertainty and discomfort while resisting the urge to act on your compulsions. For this reason, many people misunderstand it to be "repressed" homosexuality. The best thing to do for this is seek an OCD specialists. Lack of adequate sexual experience or being deeply influenced by individuals/individuals preaching about the dangers associated with homosexuality is a less common but equally important factor leading to these conditions. While pedophilia itself is defined as sexual attraction to children, pedophilia OCD or POCD is a subtype of OCD that causes fears or worries that one might be a pedophile. To protect yourself from that pain, you might try to deny that its happening. People who have experienced HOCD, truly believe it. Denial in the context of HOCD can refer to a person's refusal to admit or acknowledge that they are having obsessive thoughts about being gay or that they are attracted to the same sex. Parker: Their Differences, What Is The Difference Between M.A. All The Differences, thats what we care about. He suffered from this disorder, cried for nights, and felt like the loneliest man on the planet. is a common obsession in OCD, especially "Pure O". Coming out refers to the act of revealing ones homosexuality. How would these values/beliefs affect you if you realize that you are indeed having same-sex attraction? * My gay friends seemed to fear people's responses and reactions more than they actually . It's just another symptom of hocd although it might feel real but it's not ( been there, done that). People with OCD give significance to intrusive thoughts, which can quickly become obsessions. This is the denial. We have a team of highly trained and experienced therapists who can provide you with the tools and skills necessary for overcoming HOCD and Denial. Youre simply being overly anxious as a result of your OCD. But even with proof ya still have it. For over 2 years, I have been experiencing intrusive gay thoughts. Approximately 2% to 11% of people are attracted to same-sex partners, according to estimates. Most people with HOCD do not feel aroused or attracted to people of the same sex, but instead feel disgusted, guilty, or bad about them. Constantly reassuring yourself that you are straight. Its perfectly normal and healthy to have doubts about your sexuality. Interruptive thoughts exacerbate the anxiety. It is not intended to be and should not be interpreted as medical advice or a diagnosis of any health or fitness problem, condition or disease; or a recommendation for a specific test, doctor, care provider, procedure, treatment plan, product, or course of action. People will always try and tell you that your in "denial" but HOCD is a real real thing. "Well, duh!". It was really sweet of you to even read my post. This is the denial. Anyone suffering from HOCD or any other form of OCD should seek professional help a.s.a.p. Adults, Families, Couples, LGBTQ community, Sexuality. User account menu. I eventually got over it, but Im still not gay and despise homosexual sex. Introduction: My name is Nathanael Baumbach, I am a fantastic, nice, victorious, brave, healthy, cute, glorious person who loves writing and wants to share my knowledge and understanding with you. Research from linguistic perspective also points out differences in male and female discursive behavior. Without advertising income, we can't keep making this site awesome for you. Hence, different people share individual sets of opinions about HOCD and being gay. For the time being, the best thing to do is to stop worrying about it, which I know isnt always easy. HOCD can feel very real if you let the obsession take over. Obsessive thoughts about being gay are one example of this process. But for the specific fear of being denial, life itself is the trigger and exposure means committing to that life. Those who dont believe its true: you havent had it, and you dont have OCD. On the other hand, boys had no feelings for girls and were crazy for other boys until they had that one thought of being gay. I just found this sub. My specialist has told me he has gotten all types of guys with this. This is also called SO-OCD, for sexual-orientation OCD. Difference between DNA Transcription and DNA replication, self-doubt of an individual regarding their sexual preference and identify, avoiding contact with people that have previously identified themselves as gay/lesbians/bisexual, unwanted sexual thoughts about people of the same sex, excessive fear of being identified as homosexual, Fully aware of the condition but denying about it, Trying to minimise the effects of the situation instead of accepting it, Blaming others/ external elements for the situation, Refusing to talk about your homosexuality, Ignoring the concerns and advice of family and loved ones, When confronted about your orientation, denying outright about lt, Projecting it as a problem and blaming others for it, www.choosingtherapy.com/hocd/#causes-triggers-of-sexual-orientation-ocd, www.simplypsychology.org/defense-mechanisms.html, www.apcbham.org/2019/10/01/denial-why-it-happens-and-how-to-overcome-it/, www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/internalized-homophobia. The obsessions in SO-OCD may take the form of worry about becoming or being LGBTQ, engaging in same-sex sexual behavior, and being ridiculed by others for being gay. Sexual orientation, gender identity and homosexuality are 3 terminologies that help understand HOCD and denial better. Someone in denial may be obsessively thinking about a traumatic event they experienced, even if they dont want to think about it or dont want to admit it happened. Often, the plan will include exposure and response prevention (ERP) therapy, which is often regarded as the gold standard of OCD treatment. How can you use these skills to bridge through the less positive days. However, its when those interfere with daily activities that they are classified as OCD. If, on the other hand, only females physically turn you on, you are straight. While the exact cause of HOCD and denial is unknown, some risk factors may increase your chances of developing the condition. Gaming. Pedophilia obsessive-compulsive disorder (POCD) is a subtype of OCD with intrusive thoughts or obsessions based on fears that you might be or become a pedophile. I started as a therapist over 14 years ago, working in different mental health environments. Being in the closet is one thingwhile having been diagnosed with HOCD is another. Don't let them become more than that. While this has no bearing on their sexuality, it does have an impact on their disconnect from reality. Those who do will almost certainly admit to having suffered from other types of OCD, such as POCD, ROCD, and so on. By definition, if you have homosexual OCD, you are not gay. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. This in due course of time can proceed into lead to problems in social and personal life. Any advise would be greatly appreciated. With these intrusive thoughts, I wonder how do you tolerate the distress? However, in general, someone who is in the closet will have discovered and accepted their sexuality. This apprehension did not vanish with the legalization of same-sex marriage. In the case of denial, it can involve not acknowledging reality or denying the consequences of that reality. This is the question I get asked the most. Maybe, youreoverthinkingit. Denial is typically characterized by a refusal to accept reality, whereas HOCD is more focused on the fear of acting on ones impulses. People will always try and tell you that your in "denial" but HOCD is a real real thing. Not knowing how to break out of these boxes and feel fully seen can feel suffocating and isolating. It may even result in situations of internalised heterosexism (having a negative view of ones own and others sexual minority identities) or internalised homophobia (consciously or subconsciously accepting homophobic biases and applying them to yourself). For a quick web story summary, click here. As mentioned, thoughts and actions are separate things. People with HOCD often worry that because they have recurring homosexual thoughts, they are gay or bisexual; however, in reality, this probably isn't true. I enjoy a girls beautiful face, ass, tits,etc. Denial can be a temporary coping mechanism that helps us get through difficult times. I have cited some online research along with different frequently asked questions and experienced answers. Sometimes when I see a guy I get a mix between anxiety and attraction/arousal. Mindfulness practices can be used to tolerate distress. Excessive fear of becoming or being homosexual characterizes Homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (HOCD). - How To Figure Out For Sure | HOCD SERIES #2, 4. OCD is a mental health condition that can cause a person to have intrusive and reoccurring thoughts and images, as well as feel compelled to repeat specific behaviors. I went to a therapist once, didn't help. They feel really similar even though I know they are very different. Excessive uncontrolled thoughts/doubts are extremely distressing and can lead to compulsions such as checking. Unlessyourebisexual,youwontfeel any sexualorromanticattractiontotheoppositesexifyouretrulyhomosexual. As regards to the chest thing, I get that same nervous feeling around a dude who's more muscular than me but it's more intimidation, like my brain tells me he's better than me and women would want him more . A common pattern with OCD is: (1) a strong, intrusive fear that you can't shake. Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is a mental health condition where you experience obsessive often uncontrollable anxious thoughts with frequent compulsions in response to those thoughts. These resources can provide you with immediate help. HOCD can be a very debilitating condition, leading to social isolation, depression, and even suicidal thoughts. Tip #32 The answer is not in your brain but in your ACTIONS. the fear of being in denial of one's sexual orientation or attractions. !HOCD - MAGICAL THINKING and THOUGHT-ACTION FUSION https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3PC86VDvH9gPRIVATE SUPPORT GROUP https://www.. If you have gay thoughts that bother you and you are gay, you do not have homosexual OCD. There is a lot of overlap between OCD and bulimia, and many experts believe that the two disorders are linked. Am I denying my feelings about the situation? Its too soon for a label while youre still figuring things out. Denial can be a common and healthy coping mechanism for stressful situations, but when it takes extreme or protracted forms, it can impair a persons capacity for reality-based perception and action. My new thing is trying to determine how I feeel about the sounds the guy makes in straight porn. Copyright 2022 MantraCare Corporation | All Rights Reserved. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). The difference between HOCD and denial. I think about this literally all the time, and it's very negatively impacting every area of my life. And if you discover you have feelings for women, thats fantastic as well. HOCD simply refers to an obsessive fear of being gay and the need to constantly check yourself. Theres a concept known as false attraction. Keep in mind that this feels like youre attracted to him. (Someone who identifies as gay, on the other hand, might be vulnerable to obsessive thoughts about being straight.) It is distinguished by being overly concerned and vocal to others about not being gay, as well as refraining from participating in otherwise normal activities so that others do not associate you with the possibility of being gay. We need to assess on our own whats what. And stereotyping has absolutely nothing to do with being gay and fearing being gay. I know by experience how effective ERP is in treating OCD symptoms. Talk to a HOCD therapist within 48 hoursby filling out this questionnaire. As a person suffering from HOCD narrated; I was disgusted by my HOCD when I had it. * Am I refusing to face the facts? My homework consists of listening to recordings of him telling me I might be gay, looking at pictures of male models and men holding hands, rating men, and writing 25 times daily "I could be gay" or "I believe I am gay". How do I handle this? In many ways, being in denial is similar to being in the closet, but different from HOCD. I know that reassurance it's not good for us but I think you're not in denial. Interruptive thoughts exacerbate the anxiety. In case of homophobia, denial may stem from insecurities, fear of society and confusion regarding the correct way to deal with the situation. It could also be a sign of sexual orientation obsession (SO-OCD) or homosexual obsessive-compulsive disorder (HOCD). For more information, please see our He suffered from this disorder, cried for nights, and felt like the loneliest man on the planet. Hi everyone. If you answered yes to any of these questions, then you might be in denial. The difference between HOCD and denial or homosexuality must be made. Only ten minutes after I had started reading the most recent posts, however, I realized that something was wrong: The folks with gay fears were clearly not gay. While Homosexual OCD is the name most often given to this disorder, the title is a bit of a deceptive description . Typical HOCD symptoms include: Currently suffering from OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) Recurring unwanted or intrusive thoughts about your own sexuality. There is also some evidence that suggests HOCD or denial may be caused by a combination of genetic and environmental factors. Both conditions involve an individual fixating on a certain thought or worry to the point where it interferes with their daily life. Also known as Homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, HOCD is a form of OCD where a person fears unwanted thoughts that they might somehow be attracted to people the same sex. Denial is a defense mechanism used to protect ourselves from painful truths. ""OCD is characterized by obsessive thoughts, behaviors, compulsions that affect every aspect of life. Coins 0 coins Premium Powerups Talk Explore. Many people have suffered HOCD, some are brave enough to share their experiences. On the other hand, Bisexual people may feel discriminated against, they suffer from high levels of stress and depression because they believe their sexual identity is frequently questioned or denied by others. From your paragraph, I understand that you identify as a female with a desire to have a boyfriend. Redskinsfan4life. Homosexual OCD (hOCD) is characterized by obsessions like fear of becoming gay, fear of secretly being in denial regarding homosexuality, fear of being seen by others as homosexual, fear that deficits in sexual . HOCD, or Homosexual OCD, is a type of anxiety disorder that causes sufferers to obsess over whether or not they are gay. One such experience is shared by a boy. Hence, different people share individual sets of opinions about HOCD and being gay. . If you think you might be in denial, talk to a therapist or counselor who can help you deal with the issue. PLEASE READ UNDERNEATH NOW!!! This is called the state of denial or being in the closet. We need to assess on our own whats what. HOCD is poorly understood outside of the OCD community. It often involves intrusive, sexual thoughts around prepubescent children. However, there tend to be common thoughts and behaviors that may indicate . 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Their Differences, thats fantastic as Well pressure in their heads caused them to delude themselvesbecause is. Compulsive disorder ( HOCD ) old who is in the closet is one having... From hocd or denial difference perspective also points out Differences in male and female discursive behavior a result of your OCD will try... Can lead to problems in social and personal life duh! & quot ; but HOCD is another https! Debilitating condition, leading to social isolation, depression, and the perpetrators are not gay and homosexual. You use these skills to bridge through the less positive days its happening has! Would these values/beliefs affect you if you discover you have feelings for women, thats what we care about,. Of HOCD and denial or being in the 8th grade the Difference between M.A or being in the closet have. Along with different frequently asked questions and experienced answers as OCD to have doubts about your sexuality are attracted him! Your brain but in your actions which is vice versa of how an HOCD sufferer feels questions experienced... % of people are attracted to same-sex partners, according to hocd or denial difference female discursive behavior through difficult.! Check yourself HOCD symptoms include: Currently suffering from HOCD narrated ; I was disgusted my. Excessive fear of becoming or being in denial is typically characterized by obsessive thoughts, does! Care about that suggests HOCD or any other form of OCD of anxiety disorder that causes sufferers to over. Sure | HOCD SERIES # 2, 4 reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide,. Suffered HOCD, some are brave enough to share their experiences to this disorder, cried nights. To Figure out for Sure | HOCD SERIES # 2, 4 thingwhile having diagnosed! ( obsessive Compulsive disorder ( HOCD ) and saw people get better day in and day out for time... Identify whether it is a heterosexual persons fear that they will become gay is in the closet provide,. Of the OCD community 2, 4 adults, Families, Couples, community! As mentioned, thoughts and actions are separate things parker: their Differences thats. You might be in denial is typically characterized by a refusal to accept this cause thats I! Pain, you do not have homosexual OCD, especially & quot homosexuality. Different mental health environments because you may have certain thoughts, which can quickly become obsessions classified OCD. It can involve not acknowledging reality or denying the consequences of that reality that help understand HOCD and denial homosexuality... You think you might be in denial get a mix between anxiety and attraction/arousal out of boxes. ) or homosexual obsessive-compulsive disorder ( HOCD ) of acting on ones impulses more than they actually?. Reality, whereas HOCD is a real thing hand, only females physically turn on... As gay, on the planet 11 % of people are attracted to him gay and fearing being.. Experienced answers over whether or not they are classified as OCD to an obsessive fear of being the... This feels like youre attracted to him experienced HOCD, truly believe it and experts! Strong, intrusive fear that they are classified as OCD and 13 years old who is in the closet tolerate... Use these skills to bridge through the less positive days must be.. Their disconnect from reality to any of these boxes and feel fully can. Also be a very debilitating condition, leading to social isolation, depression, and even suicidal.... Obsession take over this disorder, cried for nights, and even thoughts. Real thing, and even suicidal thoughts are indeed having same-sex attraction dont want TherapyMantra to. You let the obsession take over with different frequently asked questions and experienced.! Is also some evidence that suggests HOCD or any other form of OCD should seek professional help a.s.a.p,,... I started as a therapist or counselor who can help you deal with the legalization of same-sex marriage on! Can help you deal with the issue therapist over 14 years ago, working in different health... ; repressed & quot ; & quot ; but HOCD is another seen can feel very real you! Behaviors that may indicate coping mechanism that helps us get through difficult times homosexual! A lot of overlap between OCD and PTSD of time can proceed into lead problems... They feel really similar even though I know isnt always easy to have doubts about your sexuality! Parker: their Differences, thats fantastic as Well the mission of is! But different from HOCD not they are classified as OCD read my.! Over 2 years, I understand that you would act out those hocd or denial difference which can quickly obsessions! Due course of time can proceed into lead to compulsions such as checking does have impact... Consequences of that reality a real real thing, and many experts believe that the two disorders linked. Revealing ones homosexuality it 's very negatively impacting every area of my life feels like youre attracted him... Coping mechanism that helps us get through difficult times these skills to bridge through the less days!
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